Open Source Coffee Break: Developer Jokes and Puns

Coffee Break: Developer Jokes and Puns

Take a break from the seriousness of coding and check out these jokes and puns!

 

Programmer Jokes and PunsDeveloper Jokes and Puns

 

Cutting code is serious business, but being a developer often isn’t. As such, this slide show takes time to present a few jokes and puns related to the developer world. Hopefully, at least one or two of them put a smile on your face or even make you laugh!

If you have one that is better, feel free to leave it in the comments. (They need to be kept clean, though!)

 

How many programmers...How Many Programmers Does It Take…

 

How many programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. It’s a hardware problem!

 

RealityWhy was the JavaScript reality show cancelled?

 

Why was the JavaScript reality show cancelled after only one episode?

People thought it seemed scripted!

 

Walking into a bar...Walking into a Bar…

 

Three Errors walk into a bar.

The barman says, “Normally, I’d throw you all out, but tonight I’ll make an Exception.”

 

Binary peopleKinds of People…

 

There are 10 kinds of people in the world—those who know binary and those who don’t.

 

C++ friendsThe Problem with C++

 

The problem with C++ is that all of your friends can see your private parts.

 

Warning!Warning…

 

A man is standing on a street corner, smoking one cigarette after another.

A lady walking by notices him. She says, “Hey, don’t you know that those things can kill you? I mean, didn’t you see the giant warning on the box?!”

“That’s OK” says the guy, puffing casually. “I’m a computer programmer.”

“So? What’s that have to do with anything?”

“We don’t care about warnings. We only care about errors.”

 

RecursionRecursion

 

I don’t always use recursion….

But when I do, I always use recursion.

– – – – –

There are two types of people in this world—those that understand recursion and those that don’t understand that there are two types of people in this world.

 

At the barAt the Bar…

 

A man walks into a bar and asks for 1.5 root beers. The bartender says, “I’ll have to charge you extra; that’s a root beer float.” The man says, “In that case, better make it a double.”

– – – – –

A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, “Can I join you?”

 

Functions...Functions…

 

When is a function a bad investment?
When there is no return.

What happened to the function that ran away?
It never returned.

When do two functions fight?
When they have arguments.

How do functions break up?
They stop calling each other.

In what unit do you measure a function’s length?
In para meters…

 

A man in a baloonA Man in a Balloon….

 

A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man below him. He lowers the balloon further and shouts at the man to get directions, “Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?”

The man below says: “Yes, you’re in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field.”

“You must work in Information Technology,” says the balloonist.

“I do” replies the man. “How did you know?”

“Well,” says the balloonist, “everything you have told me is technically correct, but it’s of no use to anyone.”

The man below replies, “You must work in Management.”

“I do” replies the balloonist, “But, how’d you know?”

“Well”, says the man, “you don’t know where you are, or where you’re going, yet you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault.”

 

Wearing glasses...Wearing Glasses…

 

Why do Java programmers have to wear glasses?

Because they don’t See-Sharp!

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